Monday, August 2, 2010

Numbers Game

So far, dating kinda sucks
but at least i have this to come home to:

The whole dating widowed mom thing is going to take some figuring out. It seems I'm in a "vulnerable place" (which, really, i think, means "upfront about not likely to put out") right now, and so I don't merit a third date to my recent second date, who had been my first second date since Karl died. The date was preceded by my third first date, the first to leave me actually feeling I might be ready to deal with dating at all.

He was intelligent and articulate, and seemed willing to talk about things in a straightforward way. I really enjoyed talking to him, and when the topic of whether or not I was "ready to date" came up, I explained that I felt very ready to date, but would have to know my partner well and have a pretty trusting relationship before I would be comfortable with physical intimacy.

In theory, when we talked about it, he was all for the idea of getting to know each other, hanging out, going slow. In practice, he walked me back to my car after dinner and tried to talk me into going home with him.

I refused, as politely and gently as I could.

The next day, I got a the "You're vulnerable, i don't want you to get hurt. We shouldn't date right now" message.

Yeah. Two dates + no nookie = i have a vulnerability problem? If you don't even know somebody's last name yet you probably shouldn't sleep with them - widowed or no.

Buy hey, two dates! That's twice as many as the last guy, and if I can just double the numbers every other time, eventually I'll find something long term, right?

So, who wants to set me up with somebody looking for a 4 date romance?

3 comments:

Unknown said...

Well shitty. Dating can suck, but don't let this guy scare you off from it. Yeah, nookie on the 2nd date for grown-up straight people is against the rules I thouht.

Beth said...

Sorry to hear that things didn't work out. Not all men are pigs, or so I've heard. :)

Jen said...

Ugh, what a putz. But better to learn that now! And the no nookie is an excellent putz barometer! Just don't resort to dating Mormons PLEASE.